Why do people put a big deal on how we look, how they look?
Thats the starting point of how I am today.
It was mid of June, when ummi said, 'sopannya diorg tu kan, sejuk hati ibu mengandung' (pointing towards a group of ladies wearing tudung labuh, baju labuh, skirt or loose pants). Tengok diri sendiri, fail ke anak ummi ni? Ok, Tudung ta berape labuh, baju pun xberape labuh, pakai seluar ta berape loose, tp dah pakai stokin ni mi. somedays, fatin pakai baju kurung kaan.?
Ummi: Tapi Dia tengok kita setiap masa kan? bukan somedays?
(please note the changes in loghat affecting the real sentence but still carry out the same meaning, as pening nk taip dlm bahase kelantan, haha)
Coming back to the States, I started to throw out things that I shouldnt be wearing. alhamdulILLAH, thanks to ALLAH for opening my eyes, to the beauty of dressing down, modestly. No more jeans for me from then, no more a little tight-fitting bajubaju yang cantik tu, no more pants. Lets start the day with a skirt. Thats where I got my little-name, akak skirt, since the past 2 years, I only wear skirts and baju kurung luar rumah, unless for sports.
Kenape pakai skirt?
Xleyh ke pakai seluar? Islam ta cakap pun takleyh. Pakailah seluar yg loose, boleyh je kan.
Sushla nk cari skirt, mahal plak tu.
Nanti musim sejuk, takkan nk pakai skirt.
Tak sush ke nk bergerak pakai skirt. Nanti nk jalan pun susah.
Living here, surrounded by the blonde, the brunette, the black, white, name anything you will definitely find one, I am blessed with the fact that I am a Muslim. Proud to be one.You live in a community where you are the minority, when everything you do or say or wear, becomes a news to others. Representing the religion you are, how should we be?
Oleh itu, untuk saya yg hina lagi daif ni, I need to do something to tell the world of how beautiful Islam is. Nak gi berarak bawak banner mmg taklah, nak gi berceramah sini sane takder ilmu, all I have is me and how I put myself out there.
Today, my classmate put a smile and said, 'We have been in the same class for three semester, and you never fail to amaze me with your skirts. Is this how Muslim suppose to dress?'
Fatin Farhana is far from being a good Muslim, banyak lagi weaknesses that I own, but personally, I dont wear pants cause I think it suffocates me. I also think that wearing pants still is a little bit sexy sebab still nmpak shape kaki. And yes, Islam tak cakap pun takboleh pakai seluar, and again, I am not saying how I dress is the correct way, boleh je pakai seluar. But please pay attention to how it was cut, loose or tight, where does the shape highlighting, when it is not appropriate for you to wear it.
Wearing a skirt does not mean you are pious and good servant, its just a choice that we made on how to dress accordingly, abiding the words of Quran in covering the aurat.
And that it is for me, a choice.
Wahai Nabi katakanlah kepada isteri-isterimu,
anak-anak perempuanmu dan isteri-isteri
orang mukmin: "Hendaklah mereka mengulurkan
jilbabnya ke seluruh tubuh mereka".
Yang demikian itu supaya mereka lebih mudah
untuk dikenal, karana itu mereka tidak diganggu.
Dan Allah adalah Maha Pengampun lagi Maha Penyayang".
Surah Al.Ahzab (59)
I am not proud of being call 'akak skirt', cause with it comes a huge responsibility.
To always be modest
To always pay attention to what you wear and how you bring yourself up to the accepted level.
To berhati2 dalam menjawab soalan kenape asyek pakai skirt je
and to always know that I am being watch, by those that in their heart, there's a tendency to change for better, but in need of a little push.
with prayer and effort,
I hope that He sees right thru me and bless me with the courage to istiqamah on my choice
cause it has definitely been hard and tough, to live in the world where what matters is how you look.
and i deeply pray that eventhough i didnt wear tudung labuh, baju labuh smpai lutut, i manage to make my mom say, ummi sejuk hati tengok anak ummi sopan everyday.
p/s: this is only a reminder, for you and especially, again and again, for me.